I really cannot say
The ache is deep inside my heart
And will never go away.
I need to feel you constantly
To get me through the day
I loved you so very much
Why did you go away?
The angels came and took you
That really wasn’t fair
They took my dearest Son
My future life, my heir.
If only they had asked me
If I would take your place
I would have done so willingly
Leaving you this world to grace.
You should have had so many years
To watch your life unfurl
And in the mist of this
Watch me, your Mum grow old.
I hope you’re watching from above
As the daily tasks I do
And let there be no doubt at all
I really did Love You.
In Loving Memory ~ A Lovely Daughter
I’m nearly at your resting place
And just as I get near,
I swear I hear your voice cry out
Look ~ I’m over here.
I’ve brought some lovely flowers
For you my lovely Daughter,
I’ll only be a minute now
I’ll go and get some water.
As I walk across the grass
And place the flowers in the pot,
I say to God, forgive me
But I miss her such a lot.
They say that everything that’s wished
Comes to those who wait,
I wish I could gather you in my arms
And run out of that gate.
A Special Son
To lose someone so special
Is really hard to bear
It hardly seems believable
That you’re no longer there.
You left us far too early
Before your time, it seems
And now you’ll never have the chance
To fulfil all those dreams.
However hard it is though
We’ll take comfort in the thought
Of all the memories we have
And the happiness you brought.
You always lived life to the full
But ours won’t be the same
Until the day when we can see
Your smiling face again.
Stairway to Heaven
If Tears could build a stairway
And memories a lane,
I would walk right up to Heaven,
And bring you back again
No farewell words were spoken,
No time to say “Goodbye”
You were gone before I knew it
And only God knows why.
My heart still aches with sadness,
And secret tears still flow,
What it meant to Love You
No one can ever know.
But now I know you want me,
To mourn for you no more,
To remember all the happy times,
Life still has much in store.
Since you will never be forgotten,
I pledge to you today –
A hollowed place within my heart
Is where you’ll always stay.
If you think you’re going insane –
If all you do is cry –
If you have trouble with most minor decisions –
If you have any feelings of rage, denial and depression –
If your friends dwindle away and you feel like you have the plague –
If your blood boils and hairs on your arm curl when someone tells you it god’s will –
If you can’t talk about it but you can smash dishes, shred old phonebooks or kick the garbage can (perfectly empty) down the street –
If you can share your story, your feelings with an understanding listener, another bereaved person –
That’s a beginning
If you get a glimmer of your loved one’s life, rather than their death –
If you can remember your loved one’s smile-
If you find your mirrors have become windows and you are able to reach out to other people –
We talk about them because we’re proud
We talk about them, because they deserve to be remembered.
We talk about them, because even though they are not physically with us, they are never far from our mind.
We talk about them, because they are part of us, a part that we could never ignore or disown.
We talk about them because we love them still and always will.
Forever. Nothing will ever change that.
Happy Birthday (again)
‘Happy Birthday’ the messages say,
But will I ever be ‘happy’ on this day,
She’s not here to share it with me,
So there is no way I can be.
It’s another Birthday without her
25 years of memories pass in a blur
Full of fun and love, now deep in the past,
Making the emptiness feel so vast.
She’s always made it so special,
So on this day I am an empty vessel,
I wish the day to be over,
It’s hard to celebrate without her.
To the outside world I am fine,
But to this day I resign,
I am broken, in pain,
Willing the return to ‘normal grief’ again.
Most of the day I am numb inside,
Anger builds then is put aside,
I do typical Birthday things,
Regretting the sadness it brings.
There is a week of prior dread,
The day itself I want to say in bed,
Then a week of exhausting recovery,
A ‘grief hangover’ my new discovery.
It’s left me thinking, we need new wording,
For someone’s Birthday who’s hurting,
For a day that’s not ‘happy’
But instead is pretty crappy.
So when you’re writing that card,
Think, will this person find this Birthday hard,
Instead of ‘Happy Birthday’ try Thinking of You,
It might just help get them through.